A Few Tips, Pointers, and
Much-Needed Skills
Larry's little instruction
manual
Okay, so you've graduated and you're off to college,
your first job, your own apartment or wherever. You've got your
high school diploma in hand and you're ready to carve your initials
on the world.
The thing is, with what our society is and, more likely, isn't
teaching young people just now, there may be a few things that
aren't in your arsenal but that you may need to get along out
here.
I don't know if there's a general term for what follows. "Life
skills" sounds kind of New Age, soft, and squishy. I lean
more towards calling them tips, pointers, and a few basic abilities.
So, for what it's worth, here are a few things that you may find
helpful as you join the rest of us out here:
1. There are five simple phrases available to you that'll make
life a lot easier on an almost daily basis. These are: "I'm
sorry."; "Can I help?"; "Please."; "I
was wrong."; and "Thank you." Note: Most people
notice individuals who use that last one frequently.
2. Stay close to those who have a good grip on life because you're
going to be judged by the friends you keep. This applies to everyone
- including those running for President - in every stage of life.
Hang out with fools and lowlifes and most will assume that you
fit that description too. No, it isn't fair, but it's the way
the world works. Get used to it.
3. Know how to change a tire. Murphy's Law says that you'll have
a flat either when there's no one else around or in a place where
the price of getting help will be somewhere north of three digits
before you get to the decimal.
4. Know how to use the jumper cables that you'd better have in
your trunk. Failing that, you might want to wear a good set of
sunglasses for the light show you're about to witness under the
hood of your car.
5. If most of your vocabulary is made up of four-letter words
and you're well known for using them about every 5 seconds, don't
be surprised if - 10 or 20 years from now - you're still stuck
on the bottom rung of the ladder in whatever job you've managed
to hold on to. Trust me, there's a reason for that.
6. Know how to build a fire. If you don't understand this one,
keep reading the news. It won't be long before there's another
story about some poor soul being stranded in some foul place.
That could be you. If you're right handed, practice building that
fire left-handed (in the rain and after dark) for the time when
you break your arm at the end of the day in a place where there's
no help to be had.
7. Know how to read a map. I know that GPS is a great thing, but
your first car may not be equipped with one and you my not have
the luxury of a wife like mine who seems to have an innate sense
of direction. Do this one thing and you may not become a charter
member of the Hekawi Tribe as in: "Where the Hekawi?"
Hikers and hunters might also take note since batteries have been
known to fail.
8. First impressions count. Always. Everywhere. With everyone.
Do your best to make a good one. It matters.
9. Live within your means. Spending money you don't have gets
you to where our federal government is right now - in a deep hole.
The reason many older people have a lot of nice things is that
they started simply. They likely drove a "beater" and
lived in a (small) one bedroom apartment. They made plans. They
worked hard. They saved. And it worked. Do anything else and you
end up in that hole mentioned above. You should also learn that
the first rule of holes is that when you find yourself in one,
stop digging. I just wish the elected clowns we have in D.C. understood
that.
10. Clean up after yourself. If you want one sure way to irritate
others, here it is: Make a mess and walk away from it. You'll
soon be known far and wide. There are (many) other things that
I haven't mentioned. Most likely, you'll learn them the way the
rest of us learned them - the hard way.
So, welcome to the jungle. Once you get the hang of living in
it, you'll find that It's actually a pretty neat place.
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